So they say u learn something new every day.
On the bar today me and the boys were talking. I learned about the word "Conundrum". Haha!
Fitzie was talking about how he just broke up with his girlfreind about 2 weeks ago (I just found out tonight). He said that i'ts a conundrum that valantines day is comming soon and he all of a sudden doesnt have a miss. I tried my best to cheer him and after a long seriouse talk about life and relationships i had to ask him what he meant exactly by "Conundrum". He actually gave me a good example to explain it.
"Your stuck in a dessert with nothing but a suitcase with millions of dollars and all you want is a glass of water"
I quite liked that. Although i thought that would be a good example of "Irony" Rather than a conundrum. In the end we both agreed that it was an ironic conundrum. LOL! Problems solved. MALE STYLES!...(Dont ask me what that means).
I learned something new about myself. I almost forgot how nice i can be. It seems that I'v lost touch with the good side of me and thus forgetting to give myself more credit for who i am as a freind and collegue. I dont often lose sight of these things but when someone hates you for being too nice, It really makes u feel bad ( Not going into detail). It sent me into a confusion with how I might very well be dealing with problems in the wrong way. Subconciously i spose I was abit down at work. People had been saying lately that i didnt smile as much ! But since iv been back from Melbourne "Apparently" I now have the smile everyone had missed. LOL!. I think i know why i smile these days and I think she knows aswell.
Anyways!... the point of this ramble is that today one of my co-workers fucked up and as a result my job became very difficult. Enough for me to be annoyed and not trust her as a team member. Infact this wasnt the first time shed done it to me. Thing is I know she isnt doing it on purpose and I know shes not doing it out of lazyness. Shes just a little slow or maybe its because of lack of practice. I donno what ever the case, I had every right to go balistic.
I didnt go Balistic. I calmly did what needed to be done to fix the problem and told her not to feel like shit. She kept appologising and was watching me just incase id flip out behind her back or something. I think i was even whistling while fixing the problem LOL!. I was completly fine. My partners on the bar were all getting upset but they wernt the ones who had to fix it which was quite funny. Sorta getting angry for me LOL!.
Anyways she came over and said sorry one last time.
i think i said something like
"Look, Im not angry at you. Infact im not angry at all Shit happens *SMILES* "
I really felt good about myself! I had such a good feeling! LIKE OMG!! AM I HAPPY? i think i am ROFL!...
I thought this was strange but i actually was happy that I wasnt annoyed..it felt rewarding I felt like me again.
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Just a sudden thought though. I miss Jenny. I couldnt stop thinking about her all day. Valantines day is comming soon and it will be the fourth month we'v been together. I pondered on the thought about wether it is unhealthy to be in this much love! I pondered it so much that i kinda didnt realise my boss was telling me to pay attention LOL!. ( I need to stop daydreaming ^_^).
I trust that what i feel for her is the best thing A man can feel. I dont think alot of people can understand why im this corney or why i talk about her so much. I know people around us hate to see us so close because it makes them want to vomit. Its ironic though because i know if they met someone as equally amazing as Jenny is, they would be exactly the same. (I know ur gonna read this so please dont repeat it to me LOL).
Hmm....that is all. Apart from the fact that its F!@#ing hot....
Thought of the day: Welcome back insomnia Y_Y; i missed you....
Mol3 s2
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